Today's post is a bit touchy and difficult to write but it is all part of our journey into the ministry. My desire is to document that journey, the good with the bad. So, here goes!
Satan has been attacking me via other Christians. It seems my roles in the church as well as my role as a mother is in question. In the past year or so, I have taken on several tasks within our church and our homeschooling co-op. This has meant many hours for me and the kids spent at church. I will be the first to admit that I have not always handled those responsibilities in a way that was pleasing to the Lord. There have been days when my children have been put on the back burner due to my "work for the Lord" and I have gotten my priorities out of order. I have been, on many occasions, more than impatient with them. I have also placed a lot of responsibility on the shoulders of my oldest child. I am ashamed to admit all of that but I have asked the Lord and them for forgiveness and mercy.
Having said all that, I am a work-in-progress. I am a wife-in-the-ministry-in-training. I need the Lord each and every day to teach me what I should be as a wife, a mother, and a woman in the ministry. I need more experienced women to teach me by loving example and gentle direction. I need support from my church family as well as my natural family. I need mercy when I do mess up.
What you may not know is that the Lord is continually growing me as a wife, mother, and woman in the ministry. I have prayed and will continue to pray for Him to show me areas in my life that need to be changed. One of those areas I have mentioned in my two previous posts - NO DR. PEPPER and MORE WATER. As a result of this change in my life, I feel healthier and I am not experiencing as much pain. I have more energy to run with my toddler and I can still get other things done around the house and at the church. That was my goal - to be able to be a better wife, mother, teacher, and church member by being healthier.
After learning what others are saying about me and my parenting, I stayed up late into the night praying and seeking the Lord on the matter. He showed me, through His Word and through His people, that I am doing what I should be doing (not always perfectly but I am at least on the right track). I should not quit working at the church but I should always put my roles as wife and mother before church work. I just have to learn to balance the ministry to my family with my ministry at the church and in WACHE. All of this is part of living the life of a woman in the ministry. Yes, there are things that need to be done at the church but they are never more important than time with my family, loving my husband and training my children. My children are my mission field and what I am doing now will impact them for all of eternity.
So, if you see me getting things out of balance, I would appreciate loving words of encouragement to help me get things back in line with what the Lord has intended. I love being a part of the family of God and getting the opportunity to serve the Lord with gladness in my home as well as in the church. I just want to please the Lord in all that I do.
All that being said, I am reminded of a song I learned as a child and I still enjoy singing it.
He's still working on me,
To make me what I ought to be.
It took Him just a week to make the moon and the stars,
The sun and Earth and Jupiter and Mars.
How loving and patient He must be,
He's still working on me!
Tuesday, August 28, 2012
Tuesday, August 14, 2012
Dr. Pepper Update
It has been exactly 15 days since I had my last Dr. Pepper. I am surprised at how easy it has been to stay away from it. Generally, when I have gone on "No Dr. Pepper" kicks, I crave it and I usually cave in after just a week or so. I wouldn't drink water (or much of anything else for that matter) while I was depriving myself of my favorite beverage.
This time has been completely different. I attribute that to the fact that I wasn't trying to change myself because that never works but I am allowing the Lord to change me. When I go to the grocery store and walk towards the soft drink aisle, I ask the Lord to help me. When I see a fast food commercial on T.V., I ask Him to take away those cravings. He has answered those prayers and then some.
Let me take you back to July 25, 1997. I was involved in a car accident that left me with a little bit of whiplash and torn muscles in my back. My back has not been the same since that day. Fast forward to November 5, 2006. I broke my left ankle while carrying my then three month old baby girl down some stairs (I missed the bottom one). I had surgery to repair my ankle five days later. My ankle has not been the same since that day. I now have two bulging disks in my spine as well as scoliosis. I experience referred pain in my hip and knee on a fairly regular basis. I also have arthritis in my ankle which hurts 95% of the time. At times, the pain in my body makes me seriously wonder how I am going to get around when I reach my 70s, 80s, and 90s if the Lord allows me that much time.
Recently, I began experiencing a great deal of pain in my back, hip, and knee and felt the need to see a doctor at my husband's persistence. My doctor referred me to an orthopedic clinic where I was told I am a good candidate for injections. I am not afraid of needles but I do not want to begin to go down that road. What to do? Physical therapy has helped me in the past but we do not have the finances for that. "Lord, what am I supposed to do," was my prayer as if I am able to fix my own problems.
On Tuesday, July 31, 2012, I woke up with the resolve to surrender all I am, all I want, and all I have to the Lord... that included Dr. Pepper. I made the choice to begin drinking water which I rarely ever did prior to that day. I had a headache that day and it would have been so easy to go into the garage and get a Dr. Pepper but I drank my water instead. After about a week of no Dr. Pepper and lots of water, I began noticing something. My back was not hurting as much. My hip and knee were not hurting at all. My ankle still hurt but that, I can live with. The Lord reminded me of something I had learned a long time ago... water lubricates your joints and the disk spaces in your spine. I had been putting harmful things into my body and those toxins were just weakening it. The water I have been drinking has been cleansing my body and providing some much needed lubrication. Praise the Lord! Now, when I start hurting, I drink my water.
As an added bonus, I am no longer craving fast food or chocolate and I was able to eat Little Caesar's pizza last night without getting sick (I have not been able to do that in a long time). I actually crave healthy food and have discovered a new love for yogurt. Why didn't I think of this before? Drink water!
I cannot help but praise the Lord for changing my heart and helping me to surrender to Him so that the next time my husband goes on a mission trip, I do not have to miss out because my body cannot handle it. I do not want to be a hindrance to my husband's ministry and I certainly want to be used of the Lord. I have been asking Him daily to show me other areas that I need to surrender to Him so that I can be used in His service for His glory. I challenge you to do the same.
This time has been completely different. I attribute that to the fact that I wasn't trying to change myself because that never works but I am allowing the Lord to change me. When I go to the grocery store and walk towards the soft drink aisle, I ask the Lord to help me. When I see a fast food commercial on T.V., I ask Him to take away those cravings. He has answered those prayers and then some.
Let me take you back to July 25, 1997. I was involved in a car accident that left me with a little bit of whiplash and torn muscles in my back. My back has not been the same since that day. Fast forward to November 5, 2006. I broke my left ankle while carrying my then three month old baby girl down some stairs (I missed the bottom one). I had surgery to repair my ankle five days later. My ankle has not been the same since that day. I now have two bulging disks in my spine as well as scoliosis. I experience referred pain in my hip and knee on a fairly regular basis. I also have arthritis in my ankle which hurts 95% of the time. At times, the pain in my body makes me seriously wonder how I am going to get around when I reach my 70s, 80s, and 90s if the Lord allows me that much time.
Recently, I began experiencing a great deal of pain in my back, hip, and knee and felt the need to see a doctor at my husband's persistence. My doctor referred me to an orthopedic clinic where I was told I am a good candidate for injections. I am not afraid of needles but I do not want to begin to go down that road. What to do? Physical therapy has helped me in the past but we do not have the finances for that. "Lord, what am I supposed to do," was my prayer as if I am able to fix my own problems.
On Tuesday, July 31, 2012, I woke up with the resolve to surrender all I am, all I want, and all I have to the Lord... that included Dr. Pepper. I made the choice to begin drinking water which I rarely ever did prior to that day. I had a headache that day and it would have been so easy to go into the garage and get a Dr. Pepper but I drank my water instead. After about a week of no Dr. Pepper and lots of water, I began noticing something. My back was not hurting as much. My hip and knee were not hurting at all. My ankle still hurt but that, I can live with. The Lord reminded me of something I had learned a long time ago... water lubricates your joints and the disk spaces in your spine. I had been putting harmful things into my body and those toxins were just weakening it. The water I have been drinking has been cleansing my body and providing some much needed lubrication. Praise the Lord! Now, when I start hurting, I drink my water.
As an added bonus, I am no longer craving fast food or chocolate and I was able to eat Little Caesar's pizza last night without getting sick (I have not been able to do that in a long time). I actually crave healthy food and have discovered a new love for yogurt. Why didn't I think of this before? Drink water!
I cannot help but praise the Lord for changing my heart and helping me to surrender to Him so that the next time my husband goes on a mission trip, I do not have to miss out because my body cannot handle it. I do not want to be a hindrance to my husband's ministry and I certainly want to be used of the Lord. I have been asking Him daily to show me other areas that I need to surrender to Him so that I can be used in His service for His glory. I challenge you to do the same.
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